Sorry for the ridiculous late review, especially because I LOVED this chapter.

Mike is moving on and that's so good to see. Not that all the problems just disappeared, he still has a lot to work on, but getting a time-out from the media, from real-life, was the right choice. I'm wondering if some of his really dark periods could have been prevented if they would have made this trip earlier. But I guess he needed to be ready to agree to be so close to people he wanted to hide from... Because, as much as they are his friends and family, as much as he enjoys being with them and as supportive as they are, the beginning of this chapter was so tense.

Mike was so tense and every word you wrote sent shivers down my spine because of how Mike felt - unsafe, watched and judged even though he was only surrounded by people that want to help him get better.

Anyway, I really liked the way you described Mike's and Anna's relationship and that he only saw how much physical contact they normally had. It must have been so hard on Anna to live without that, to see that it is not doing any good when she touched him. He was truly broken and I'm so happy that he is getting pieces together. Time, family... and he allows himself to heal, which is probably the most important!

I'm glad to see Mike is making progress! He's been through so much in this story, it's heartbreaking. I really wasn't sure if he'd ever be intimate with Anna again. Nicely done on that scene, by the way. We don't read too much of that here!

Even the guys don't seem to be coddling Mike too much, and Mike didn't make too big of a fuss over the perceived special treatment of the room. I hope he gets back to normal. <3

Yay! An update! I was so concerned you had given up on writing, but finally a new chapter was posted. I liked the idea to get away and have a vacation. It was good to see Mike relax a little and even having sex with his wife again; that was a huge step.

I won't tell you to update soon this time, because I know that real life always gets in the way, for all of us. I'll tell you, however, that I still love this story and that I can't wait for more :)

Yes! I can't even describe how happy I am that you came back! I love this story so much. It's good to see the guys and their families all together and I'm proud of Mike that he's gotten so far already even though he's still hurt.

I won't hide it - I'm a sucker for Bennoda so I hope to see more of Mike & Chester friendship moments. I also love Anna here and how supportive she's been to her husband over the time.

Your writing is impressive too, you portray their personalities so well. I don't think I've ever reviewed this story but when I found it out (about a year ago, I believe), I immediately fell in love with it. It made me so sad to see it unfinished but it's understandable that life gets in the way.

Anyway, I hope to see more of this story soon! :)

I really really liked this therapy chapter! Mike needs someone to talk to, and I found it interesting to see that at first he wasn't happy with the therapist he had, but found a better one later. I've never been to therapy, but I guess it's important to find one who you feel comfortable with. Also, I wish all the paparazzi would leave him and his family alone...

I wonder how this story will end, because I seriously can't make any predictions at this point, which means you're doing a great job in writing this!

Please update soon, I still love this story :)

I can tell that you have put a lot of work in this chapter and also a lot of research. It paid off, it is really well written and it is reflecting on a therapy session in a good way. Of course every therapist is different, as is every patient. But the general idea of asking the right questions and reading the person and the reaction is happening in exactly that way. It is all about trying to find a way to deal with things, not by dictating actions or forcing answers but by directing a talk in a direction that will lead to any result: either that you start a therapy method, that you just get things of your chest, that you get to share what you can't share with anyone else and that you learn to take another standpoint on your own memories and emotions. That all comes from my personal experiences, so maybe someone else sees it completely different, but in my eyes you did a really good job in this chapter!

Content wise... I totally understand that Mike is struggling with opening up. Even the simplest question can be hard to answer and just because it's on his mind doesn't mean that actual words are coming out of his mouth. Which is probably a weird thing, seen that he earns his money with writing lyrics. But it's not that easy when it comes to his own trauma I guess. And I can totally picture him walking around the room, fighting with himself what to say. He is so restless that it makes sense.

Talking about the influence that the kidnapping had to his life must be hard but it might gives him the opportunity to see that he is missing out on a lot of things. And so is his family. Not to blame him but to make him understand that moving forward is inevitable. And I like the suggestion of getting away for a bit. Just getting some distance between the family and the paparazzi. It would allow him to relax a bit and that might be necessary to take the next step in moving forward. And of course I would love to read a chapter with Mike, his family, the guys and their families all being together. Just saying ;)

So, I'm curious what comes next. You have surprised me so often in the past with chapters about characters I hadn't been thinking of, sharing all the different point of views and so I'm really looking forward to the next!

I didn’t expect an Anna-chapter but it made totally sense at it came at the right time! I’m really curious about how Mike is doing but it is also necessary to see all the other people in his life and how they deal with it, to understand the whole picture of things that are going on.

I really appreciated that in this story, that we got so many different point of views and it’s good to see that you continue doing this! I mean we had another Anna chapter already but there she also talked to Mike and he was part of it “in real”, not only in her thoughts. That was all pretty intense to read. To see how hard it must have been for her while Mike was gone and the constant fear of having lost him already. What I related to the most were her thoughts on the last interaction; the last hug, kiss, words. It’s on my mind a lot when it comes to people that I’ve lost in my life. You brought it to the point...

And then there was the last part; Mike agreeing that things need to change and he can’t tackle this all by himself. That’s good! that’s really really good!!

I love Anna's view on everything, and I appreciate that you include it so detailed into your story. It makes everything more interesting to have various people's insight, so please update soon :)

What a great chapter! I like how you can portray Mike's state of mind; how he is still struggling with the flashbacks and is trying to deal with his memories (whether these memories are true or just made up in his mind) by painting. Those paintings have to show horrible things, if he doesn't want his kids to see them, but I think it's a good thing that he's trying to deal with it through art. He totally has to see a therapist, because he can't deal with it alone, and Anna can't help him enough, either.

Please update soon!!!

I CAN FINALLY WRITE A COMMENT!

This review will probably show if there is a sign/word limit! (Spoiler: it's not!) So, here we go. Reviews for chapters 26-29. Now your review-count is right again ;)

CHAPTER 26

Wow... this was so hard to read. It must be horrible to struggle with nightmares that are more like flashbacks. It's not that you wake up, realising it was only a dream. It's waking up and knowing that it actually happened. That must be the hardest part.

I'm so glad Anna was there. Even though he feels uncomfortable and they haven't been closer than they are right now - it is good to see that she can still sooth him, that he is actively reaching out for her, that her presence and touch is calming him, grounding him. I think that is only possible because he opened up (or rather because she told him that she knows what happened).

Still, it sucks that he is struggling so much and its heartbreaking to see how much his life in impacted because of one asshole... And knowing that Mike needs to talk to the police and talk about what happened is not only frightening the shit out of him, but also out of me. I'm afraid that he can't make it through that and that things will get worse. I vote for Ches going with him, being with him, supporting him.

I'm not sure if I wrote it or just thought it but (as mad as I was when Chester left the room after Mike's confession) I do understand why this is hard on the singer. He can relate to it like no other and must bring back memories for him as well. Still, I think he is the only one getting Mike and the only one who can relate to the emotion he is going through so I think he is the right person for Mike to lean on. So I hope he is with him for all the next steps...

CHAPTER 27

I swear that I didn’t know that Chester would be there, I just really hoped for it. And I was so glad to read that my wish came true. He is the only person that can be there for Mike and his support when they are in the car and when they are in the building is so needed. I was positively surprised that he managed to stay so calm and it was exactly what Mike needed.

That he wasn’t allowed in the room when Chester is telling everything is unfair; yes, maybe the first part should have been told in separate interviews, the part where they get stopped on the street and when Jim and Cale got shot (btw, such a hard part to read… I could feel the pain radiating from Mike. It’s not just that they died, he was fucking there… he was there and saw it happen…). But after? It’s not that Chester can say anything about what happened at the house and that he would need to testify himself about it.

Mike could have really needed this extra layer of support. His lawyer seems to be a good guy and I’m glad that Mike actually allows him to feel a bit better, even though what he was just put through. It must be so hard to relive all the shit that happened and talking to strangers about it…? I know it’s necessary but I’m so afraid that he will crawl back into his shell now because he had to give away too much.

I totally see why he feels so protective over the sexual abuse; first because he doesn’t want others to know and second because he doesn’t remember everything himself. I think it is important that he tries to, but that should happen in a safe environment, either with Anna or Ches and a therapist. Not with the police… I see why they want to have this information and the documents from the hospital are obvious and they need to ask. I don’t think it was necessary to show him the photos though… As I said, he needs to face it and he also needs to try to remember the parts that got lot (I guess due to trauma) but that shouldn’t be happening at WB with strangers in a room.

Ok, I think that was enough of my thoughts here. Only one thing, I was a bit sad where it ended, I needed a Mike/Chester hug here! Something that shows me that he will be ok. It was so hard to have Mike suffering for that long, being in so much emotional pain and in such a bad headspace - I really had hoped to read about the next couple of minutes as well.

Oh, on a last note; I love all the details, like Mike thinking about his clothes and how he feels protected by them. It’s those small things that are making this a really, really goos read. It shows all the different effects this hostage had on him and how much it determine his life right now. I mean, it is horrible that it does, but it makes the story a great one!

CHAPTER 28

“You’re a fucking warrior, buddy.”

Mike for sure is. He really doesn’t see it but he is fighting so hard. And he has Chester right by his side and that is warming my heart. This whole chapter was so wonderful. I sobbed like hell as soon as Mike started crying but then, the end of the chapter made me smile. Because he is not alone and he has people that care so much and that can help him. First I thought that Mike would brush it off but I’m so glad he let it all out and that he allowed Chester to comfort him and to be there for him. Sometimes it's the only thing that can be done: crying and letting it all out.

And I think Chester is so strong as well. He must get reminded of his own abuse all the time but he shoves it away and makes it possible for Mike to lean on him. When he says that he understands and that he feels what Mike is going through, it’s not an empty phrase because he definitely knows. Of course, every person's experiences are different, they are different people, the situations are different… but there are parallels and when Chester tells Mike that he is doing great, he better believes it!!

What else do I have to say? Maybe that this was one of my favourite chapters so far. Because I love the Bennoda-friendship and even though it’s a constant up- and down, showing emotions is so important. It’s hard, it hurts, but it at least leads somewhere else than just Mike bottling things up and letting them destroy him from the inside.

Oh, and I loved the ending of the chapter. I don't know why but the last sentence was just perfect. Sometimes it just happens, all the writing is good but then the chapter ends with a simple sentence that is just perfect. This was absolutely the case here!! <3

CHAPTER 29

Ok, now I’m worries about Mike again. He can’t keep doing this to himself. After he talked to Ches, after he made himself vulnerable, it should get better and not worse! He shouldn’t have all those feelings of guilt, he should be moving forward through his art and not getting into another circle of self-doubt and self-hate!!

So I totally agree with Anna. He needs to talk to someone. I had hoped that she and Ches (and maybe the others) would be enough but there are so many obstacles and so many things they can’t help him with, he really needs someone else to talk to and to bring things into perspective. There are things that he judges as abnormal/disgusting/etc. but it’s just part of what use does with a person and talking to a specialist will probably be the only way to deal with it!

I’m curious about his art though. A bit afraid as well, because I didn’t really understand what he is drawing right now, but mainly curious what he is doing. Like… not a graphic description but I was wondering about his comment that “sufferings were the source of pleasure to others.” Is he just referring to art in general and that more violent motives are still being considered as art? So yea… this left me with a few questions.

That Mike still has flashbacks is not surprising, especially when he only tries to push memories away instead of really working through things. Again, when he talked to Dave and then to Ches in more detail, I really hoped that he would get better and allow those talks to happen whenever he needed it but it seems that he still tries to fight through stuff all by himself. It’s good that he is not sending Anna away and that she can help him to come back from the place the flashbacks brings him to, but at some point he will be all by himself and the memories will come crashing down on him and what happens if no one is there he can cling to? What if he is alone with the kids and does something stupid? Not because he is cay but because he just doesn’t know what he is doing anymore because of the flashback?

So, in conclusion, he really needs to get some help. Maybe they should have an intervention, the guys and Anna. Just to make clear that they love him and need him and that he needs to work on things to make it back to some kind of a normal life.

Again such an amazing chapter! I was so happy when I saw your update :)

I loved that Chester was so determined to find Mike after the police interrogation, and I also enjoyed that there was so much 'Chester-Action' in this chapter in the first place. Him being strong and telling Mike that he did lots of stupid things while dealing with his past abuse was really sad, and helpful for Mike at the same time.

Please update soon!!!

Also, if you decided to write a sequel, I'd read the hell out of it ;) Seriously, I think many readers would be interested in a sequel to this great story, so if you feel like writing one, do it :)

So Much Chester in this chapter! I love that he HAD to go find Mike, no matter what. I love that he didn't care about anything else, and was so focused. It just makes my Chester heart swell. And I have to say, when Mike went to the roof, I was a little worried. Must be my twisted mind, but my first thought was he was going to jump. Isn't that horrible? Yes, yes it is. But he didn't! And I love all of Chester's words of encouragement. I think this tie you've created between them, stemming from shared experience of abuse, is so unique. That's always been Chester's cross to bear, and in this story, it's like it's shared with Mike. I don't know, there's just something special about that. I love seeing Chester as the "strong" one, even though he's totally right when he says he's done lots of stupid things to get to where he is today. I love it.

As for a part two...idk. Didn't you say the sequel/next story would be more gruesome? Or am I making that up? Either way, I say go with your gut. You're a great writer, so whatever you decide to do, I'm supportive.

Mike seriously needs a hug, there’s only so much angst Mike I can take and this is the perfect level of it. The std test has me scared, I need more ❤️

Anwww poor Mike i just wanted to give him a hug.

Well. That was uncomfortable. And an STD test, wow. I think Mike might be repressing more memories than he's letting on at this point. I just don't even know what to say. Interested to see what's next.

Well that was intense! Sheesh! Poor Mike :( I thought he was going to get out of there without freaking, but then the pictures...and the STD test. Wow. I just want to hug Mike! That detective really pushed, which I guess is his job, but still. I'm glad Chester was at least in the building. Too bad he couldn't be in the room, too. Then again...it goes back to, would Mike have wanted Chester to see those pictures? Such a hard place to be in.

Ready for more! (because I'm needy)

Such a great chapter, seriously! I love this story more and more, and I'm glad you updated so soon :)

The police interrogation scene was just so good, I could feel Mike's hesitation to talk about what was done to him, and then when the cop showed him those photos of his bruises and confronted him about what the nurse said about the STD-test...I can't wait for more!!!

Please update soon :)