Category Linkin Park

An Affair That Is Not An Affair by ninja

Chapter n°1

Here I come with a new story. This one will be a multi chapter one.

As always, reviews and rating are appreciated.

A special thanks to Halvlang for correcting the mistakes!

Happy reading!


The guitarist and vocalist have been kissing for the past 10 minutes. They just had an amazing show and had met in Chester’s room to talk about a minor problem which ended with them making out on the bed. Clothes started to be taken away and now they are laying in boxers, ready to give in for any sexual intercourse they could have right now.

But at some point, they realise what they are doing and Brad pushes his friend away. Backing off, feeling a little lost and knowing very well they are not supposed to do that. He finds some lame excuse in order to leave, and dresses up faster than he ever thought he could before leaving to his room.

The next day, they had talked briefly, agreeing it shouldn’t have happened and after this evening, they hadn’t kissed again.

It started when Hybrid Theory came out and they had to share a bunk as they didn’t have enough space for everyone in the tour bus. At first, they’d give each other innocent hugs and smiles when they’d sense something was off with the other. When they would share a hotel room, the hugs led to light kisses and hands wandering, lightly making out. It didn’t go further than that. Even though they never talked about it as for them it was okay to do so, they kept it secret. They were married men who, when on tour, would comfort each other with kisses and making out sessions and that was fine with them.

His best friends help Chester fight his demons the best they can. But when the demons take over, it leaves them heartbroken, destroyed, and they don’t know how they’ll make it through this loss.

Year 2017, Season: Summer/ Autumn

Brad starts drinking; 2 month after Chester’s passing and he had drunk more than what he had his entire life.

Elisa, his wife, is the one who has to pick him up from the kitchen floor when he’s passed out after drinking another bottle of alcohol to forget about his new reality, who drags him to the bathroom so he can empty his stomach and wash himself. Then force him to drink water and eat something. She lays him on the bed, puts a blanket over him and lets him sleep it off his hangover. At first she hid the bottles of alcohol, then threw them away but he bought new ones and she doesn’t know what to do anymore. She tries to help him heal, his friends try but he’s lost and not sure how he’s going to get out of this phase. He feels like he’s sitting on a boat during a storm, too far from the coast to back. She must take care of a broken husband and three children by herself. She’s the only adult in the household and she doesn’t know how much longer she will be able to do that. She has to go through her own grief but she cannot let it show for the sake of her children who need at least one functional parent.

One day, she calls Dave because she doesn’t know what to do anymore. She’s crying on the phone begging him to come help out because she can’t do this. She’s exhausted, wants to sleep, needs to take her children to various activities and Brad had another breakdown. He arrives as fast as he can, takes care of the kids and has a long talk with the guitarist afterwards. There are screams, tears and things are thrown at the walls but at the end of the hours long discussion, they both are calmer, Brad opens up a little bit about his pain and agrees on seeing a therapist.

Dave decides to stay at their place for a few days, wanting to help more. He can see his friends are both in a bad place mentally and he’s sure they can’t make it by themselves.

Brad still drinks but a lot less, time goes by and he gets back on his feet again. But there is still this look of sadness on his face that never fades away. He does smile, laugh, seems happy but he never feels truly happy anymore. He can’t talk to anyone about how close the singer and he were. He wonders if they were ex-lovers and, if it comes out, is scared it’s going to break his marriage and that he won’t be able to be part of the band anymore. The last thing he wants is to lose his family and friends, therefore keeps it to himself.

What he doesn’t know is that Chester had written down what happened in his diary that Talinda found and she is willing to get an explanation.

Year 2018, Season : Spring.


Talinda drives to the Delson household and Brad can sense something is wrong when she enters without greeting him back.

“What’s the matter? Is something wrong?” he asks, worried.

“Yes, something is very wrong, I found this in Chester’s things!” she yells at him, shoving the singer’s notebook at him. He checks it for a little while, not realising what it is until she opens one of the pages where he wrote about that one evening where they had almost crossed the line.

“I didn’t know he wrote that down.”

“That’s all you’re going to say?!”

“What is there to say?” he sighs.

“How close were you two?” she scolds him.

“He was one of my best friends.” he argues.

“Does your wife know about this?”


“What should I know about?” asks Elisa who had just come back home and they can both see how puzzled he gets in that moment. He knows he’s trapped with no idea how to explain any of this.

“Our husband’s being lovers.” answers Talinda before Brad has time to even open his mouth

“That’s not exactly how it was.” he defends himself.

“What was it then?” she attacks back.

“Hold on. You did what?!” asks Elisa, still trying to figure out what is going on.

“They almost had sex” explains Talinda.

“You and Chester?” she asks Brad

“We agreed the next day it was a mistake and never talked about it again!” he tries.

“The thing is, I would maybe let that go if he didn’t wrote that you two kissing happened quite often!”

“He wrote that?”

“So you’re not denying it?”

“We did but it wasn’t like that. We used it as comforting when we were down and…”

“You could have come to us”

“Yes, we could’ve but... We never talked about that, or the consequences it would have. We just...”

“Kept it secret.” Adds Talinda, finishing his sentence.

“Yes” he says quietly, biting his lips

“How long did it last?”

“I don’t want to know-” mentions Elisa who seems crushed

“I’m…” he tries, approaching her but she doesn’t let him.

“Don’t, I don’t want to hear your apologies right now.” She tells him, making him back off.

“Can we talk, just the two of us?” he asks his wife.


“Tal… He loved you I swear”

“Oh, really?! I once asked Chester if you two ever kissed and he said no.”

“How is that my fault?”

“Why did he lie?”

“I don’t know. I had no idea you asked that!”

“Why didn’t you two end up together?”

“Because we were not in love!”

“I still can’t believe this!”

“I’m sorry Talinda, I… We never meant to hurt anyone. We never thought about the repercussions.”

“You never thought about your families?” she asks, dumbfounded.

“Of course we did. Family always came first!”

“If this was true, you two would not have had an affair!”

“It wasn’t!”

“What was it then?”

“I… I don’t know! We used it to comfort each other, when he would have a

hard time and…” he explains

“He lied for you?” asks Elisa, who had been silent again until now.

“I didn’t know that. I swear.” He repeats.

“Brad, I want you to leave, I need time to think and process all of this.”

“For how long?”

“A few days.” she sighs.

He nods as he walks away from the two women.

They keep talking as he packs a bag, takes his car, driving away. Not sure what to do now, he decide to go to Dave’s place. He knows his friend will let him stay at least a few hours until he figures out what to do.

“Did you have a fight?” asks the bassist after greeting his friend.

“Sort of. Is it okay if I stay here a few days?” asks Brad with a breaking voice.

“Of course. Just tell me what happened so we can find a solution.” He answers, as they walk toward the living room.

While playing with a hole from his t-shirt, Brad explains how Talinda found Chester’s diary from a few years back, how close he actually was with the singer, why he felt like nothing would ever be fine anymore after he left, the guilt being too much some days. They had stopped during the last few years, after that night when they almost had sex. They stayed close, but there was no more hugging and kissing involved. It was better so. But how can he make his wife understand that it wasn’t an affair, he doesn’t know.

Once done, he looks back at his friend with tempting eyes, not knowing what his reaction is. Dave looks weirded out by the confession, a bit mad and grossed out but also shocked.

“Please don’t hate me” he pleads, whispering.

“I don’t, I just… didn’t expect that-” States the redhead, wanting to reassure his friend.

“I understand if you don’t want me to stay, I can just leave. I shouldn’t have come here in the first place-” he starts as he’s getting up and about to leave.

“No, no, no, stay. You’re staying here. We’ll figure this out.” He stops him, making him sit down again.

“Elisa asked me to leave for a few days because she needed some time to think.”

“That’s understandable.”

“Yes, I didn’t say it wasn’t. But I’m scared about what’s going to happen now”

“Only time can tell. I’m here for you. You can stay here, my door is always open. You know that right?”

“Yes, thank you-” answers Brad, relieved. “Could you check on her later? Make sure she doesn’t need anything.”

“Of course.”

“She didn’t let me apologise. Is it a bad sign?”

“I don’t know. But I’ll talk to her. See how she’s doing.”

“Thank you.”

“You’ll be okay. As you said, you two had stopped.”


“Be honest with her, that’s all I can say.”

“I will be, but I never thought about telling her about this or anyone really.”

“I get that, but it’s out now, you have to deal with it”

“But we were two in this. It wasn’t only me!”

“I didn’t say the contrary. But they obviously can’t scream at him. So I’m sorry to tell you that but as much as they will be mad at the two of you, you will get all the yelling.”


They spend the rest of the afternoon together, and when Linsey arrives, Dave explains briefly why Brad is staying at their place, without giving away the real reason. She understands, knowing very well that she’ll know more when they are ready.

Dave calls Elisa that evening, as promised. Making sure she’s doing alright and offering to come by, to which she refuses. All she asks him is to keep the alcohol away from the guitarist and promises that she’ll call him in a few days. She needs some time to process the news. It’s not the nicest thing to hear and she wants some time alone. She let him know she sent her kids to their grandparents for the weekend before they say their good byes.

Dave and Brad keep talking until early morning until they both fall asleep. Both wanting everything to settle itself.

...To be continued...


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